Paper Trail

Many of the weddings I officiate are held outdoors. The very nature of an outdoor wedding is, well, nature.

I do not understand why a bride in the outback (or on the golf course, in the garden, or by the ocean), tries to put down a white paper aisle runner. These runners are all doomed to either fly up in the air like a roll of Charmin gone wild, or worse yet, wrap around the shoes of every bridesmaid trying to make her way to the front. I have had little flower girls lifting their feet high like ponies in the snow, trying to keep from tripping.

Please, brides, save yourself some trouble and just say no to paper aisle runners. They are at best a source of comic relief, but they can actually pose a hazard.

Outdoor Weddings -- Expect the Unexpected

I love outdoor weddings. They are almost always more personal and relaxed, less intimidating, and good natured -- unless nature isn't good.

Some brides and grooms can't handle rain, wayward birds, golfers who have been to the drink cart too many times and insist on playing through, and curious bees. Depending on the venue, there may be a number of factors over which you have no control if your wedding is under the open skies. Weather is the obvious bugaboo. And so is ambient noise. It's not always man-made, either. I officiated at one wedding where the birds were so excited about the music being played that they joined in and nearly drowned out all other sounds. I also had to delay a wedding for almost a half hour when an enormous flock of birds landed in a tree under which the ceremony was to be held. The birds weren't moving, so we had to.

However, I will repeat my first statement: I love outdoor weddings. I would just urge you to consider your own likes and dislikes before you opt for the great outdoors instead of the relative safety of a hotel, chapel, or large living room. If you need every detail to be perfect, get married inside. If you don't, you may feel like you are on a camping trip wearing prom clothes.